Peak Mombie
Good morning. Afternoon. Evening. Whatever it is where you are. Feels like it’s the middle of the night for me even though the sun is out… I am hella tired today.
For those of you that don’t know, I’ve got two tiny humans. My daughter is five, and my son is going to be two in august. If any of you out there are work-at-home parents you understand that this is not always an easy thing, haha!
My son slept like shit last night. He is a pretty good sleeper all around, way better than my daughter who didn’t sleep through a single night until after she was two years old. So when he has a really bad night, it realllly knocks me out of whack. After the two hours of sleep I did get, I peeled my eyes open and staggered to the french press like my body was made of anvils. I’m now three coffees in, and we’re eating lunch, and I still just want to curl up in a ball on the floor and pass out.
Anyway, I’m not writing all this so that people pity my plight, like I made the kid knowing full well there would be days like this. I like to write about the difficulties of being a work-at-home parent so that other work-at-home parents don’t feel like they’re alone on the shitty days. There is lots of stuff going around on the internet all the time that is all ‘we don’t have it together and that’s okay, just do your best’ kind of inspirational posts which is awesome. And I know a lot of moms personally that are super candid on social media or in person about the struggles of their parenting journeys.
But that doesn’t mean that the impostor syndrome isn’t still strong. That pinterest isn’t full of these picture-perfect families doing crafts all smiling in recycled clothing and everything is sunshine and roses all day long. Or at least, it looks that way.
So cross-reference the mom impostor syndrome with writer impostor syndrome and, well, it’s a double whammy. I’ll be honest, this far into my writing journey and parenting journey I don’t really get impostor syndrome anymore. I definitely have days where I’m down on myself because I’m not at the level I want to be, and push myself to work harder, or cry to my mom friends and they let me vent and make me feel better. I’m blessed with incredibly supportive friends that I can be honest with about how I’m feeling and never feel judged, and vice versa.
But I know not everyone has that. Writing can be a lonely thing, sitting at your computer all alone. Parenting kids can be a lonely thing, if your spouse works outside of the home, or you’re a single parent, or you know, we’re in the middle of a pandemic where nobody can go anywhere. And even though I know I’m incredibly lucky to have a support system of friends personally and online, not everyone has that.
In all this super serious rambling, I swear I’m getting to the point. That point is this. We’re not perfect. Sometimes we’re fucking tired. Sometimes we’re not at our best. And it’s okay. And connecting with other people is so, so important. Don’t ever feel like you’re the only one. There are legions of us.
So hi, I’m Emily. I’m a mombie, much of the time. I’ve got two small kids that I homeschool, and attempt to balance that with writing my own books and a freelance ghostwriting and editing business. And like taking care of my house and shit. It’s a lot sometimes. And every time one of my online friends is like ‘you are killing it! How do you do so much?!’ I’m like… am I? I guess most of the time I am, even when it doesn’t feel like it. Because a lot of the time, it doesn’t feel like it. Especially on days like today where my eyes feel like they’re bleeding.
So anyway, I guess my mainest point is that you’re not alone, and finding people you can talk to when you’re having a shit day that will tell you it’s okay and that you’re killing it is good. I’m one of those people. Come hang out with me.
This blog is pretty recent, I literally just started posting yesterday, but I’m not a complete stranger to this format. I had a blog quite a few years ago that has since been dusted, and I also was writing some blog-style entries in a non-fiction book on Wattpad (that desperately needs updating, add that to the to-do list, Emily!).
Some of my most engaged-with chapters in that book were ones about writing while working from home, or writing with kids crawling all over your face. I definitely don’t have be-all and end-all advice, but I have some insights and I know a lot of other writer parents that might be interested in guest posting.
So in and around book reviews, WWW Wednesdays, indie publishing experiences and whatever other random shit I feel like sharing, I’m starting the category Writing Through Chaos which will encompass what it’s like to be a work at home writing parent. Because Work At Home Writing Parent is too wordy.
Do you frequently write books with children climbing all over your face? Have you been in the throes of an angsty scene while Peppa Pig giggles on in the background? Or have you ever been writing on your phone in one hand while the other balances a nursing baby at three in the morning?
High fives, yo. Also, you got this and you are killin’ it.
